“I know God will not give me
anything that I can’t handle, I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.” Mother Teresa
My
training plays a daily role in my life (I consider rest a part of my training
too). It allows me to prepare for my
races and meet the goals that I set for myself.
Most importantly, my training helps me to cope with life’s challenges. On New Year’s Eve I was faced with one of the
greatest challenges of my life; my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.
I
am an only child. My mother and I are
very close. She raised me on her own and
instilled a strong sense of faith, family, and determination in me. She and I talk almost every day, sometimes
several times a day. She is my best
friend and advisor, and I can always count on her to have my back. At the age of 71 my mom received her master’s
degree in divinity. She is vibrant and
loves to bake. I could not ask for a
better mom.
So
why at the age of 73 has my beautiful mother been diagnosed with such a
horrible disease!? Devastated does not
begin to describe my initial reaction.
It took everything I had not to break down in the doctor’s office. I didn’t want my mom to see me upset, because
I knew it would upset her. Surprisingly
my mother was very calm when she received her diagnosis. She told me that she would do whatever the
doctor and I told her to do, she was going to fight the disease with all she
had, and she knew that God would be with her.
That’s my mom!
So
as my mom leaned on her faith and coped, I was falling apart. I found myself crying almost every day and
losing my motivation to do much of anything, especially train. I had so much going through my mind. Why my mom?
What can I do to help her? How
long will she be able to live alone? My
head was spinning. All I wanted to do
was to crawl into a hole. My mom means
everything to me, and knowing that this disease was going to slowly take her
away from me….I just couldn’t handle it.
How do you mourn the loss of someone who is still alive? I know there have been medical breakthroughs
with the treatment of Alzheimer’s, but there still isn’t a cure.
I
knew I had to get it together for my mom and I needed to get back on track with
my training, so I reached out to my coach and teammates. I told them I needed them to keep me
accountable. I asked if they would
either text or call me to see if I was coming to our workouts. In my mind if I knew someone was expecting me
to be at a training session, I would show up because I felt obligated to do
so. Well my coach and team stepped up
big time! They texted me and sent me
Facebook messages to make sure I came to the workouts.
It
wasn’t easy at first to get back into my training groove. I felt this heavy weight on me, but the more
I trained the better I begin to feel. I
was still upset about my mom’s diagnosis, but I felt more emotionally and
mentally equipped to handle the situation.
I am now completely back on track with my training. My mom and I are working together to make
things as easy for her as possible as we begin this journey. And on those days when I feel down, my
training sessions serve as my special time to work out everything that I am
feeling.
Very nicely written and very inspiring.
ReplyDeleteYou truly are an inspiration. Keep on being that wonderful person & daughter you are & God will take care of the rest.
ReplyDelete